How NOT to do it

Having managed to hit the deadline to get online without having to hand her profile over to her fellow Sluts, T-Bag is now making the most of a week of sober evenings, attempting to make up for lost time.

            As she’s done the whole ‘looking online’ thing before (even though last time was in New York, so I can only assume it was painfully more cool than our version), I was of the opinion that she would know exactly how to get the best out of the sites that she’s on and that she would be able to filter through all the searches, remaining safe from the crazies.

            Not so. Yesterday I received a slightly disturbed email from her, suggesting that she’d found herself profile face-to-face with a less than savoury suitor. I wasn’t sure just how bad it could be, but, well, see for yourself:

I’m not a pro at this whole online thing, and I’m sure that I’m not looking for the same thing as everyone else, but, well, is anyone in the world honestly looking to buy whatever it might be that this profile is selling?
          Genuinely, the thing that worries me most about this is that OkCupid thinks that me and naughty_boy_09 are a 66% match - I really hope this is just based on 60% due to the fact we're human and 6% on the fact we live in the same city and nothing else, otherwise all faith in the system has officially gone. OkCupid - you're going downhill in my opinion!